Cowherd’s Corner: Wake-Up Call

What are you compensating for? Who the hell do you think you are? You are broke, but social media has you feeling richer than you will ever be. Your twitter followers and Instagram likes got you feeling like the man, huh? You’re not the man; you’re just some empty vessel posing to be more than what you are in an ocean full of filters and hashtags.

They [women] will not love you when the tattoos fade and twitter and/or Instagram becomes a thing of the past. The thought of these hoes loving you is what keeps you going? Oh I see. The fantasy of these women and what they think you are is going to come down blazing and there is not enough water to put it out. It’s all going to be gone over the thirst.

When your followers grow up and this life of cyber glamour and flashiness fades, what will keep you going? These women?  Too many women do not even have control over their own minds anymore; Nicki Minaj, Beyonce, and for the classiest ones Love & Hip-Hop and Real Housewives of Atlanta got them putting life into perspective.

These hoes are cheaper than the lunch special at the Chinese spot but y’all in love and can’t get enough, cut the bs. We hype this simplistic and utterly embarrassing bullshit and for what? The recognition? Please. These women keep up a circus act, bravo. Man listen, life comes and goes as quick as you can create a meme of Drake looking stuck at the Toronto Raptors game. Don’t waste time on someone who’s riding d*** for the dude with the most followers and averaging 112 Instagram likes, her interest is as empty as her skull.

This is wake-up call fellas! Stop reaching for these women who want men that are not even in their own tax bracket, bodies and personality as fake as Miracle Watts, and 132 unread text messages. You are just a number or another free meal playboy, game recognizes game and you my friend better catch a grip before you lose. Want to keep flexing for these women and spending more than you can afford, the sh*t will catch up to you and when it does, she in the next nigga DM’s.

You cannot afford to flex and you do not even have a pot to piss in, because that is not how it works. You want a chick that’s real, 100 percent, and is down for you? Then be real with yourself and your capabilities, it is better to under-reach and over-deliver than to over-reach and under-deliver. These hoes ain’t loyal and if you cannot cut it in their world, you’ll be another ain’t sh*t nigga and that sh*t seems to be contagious the way it’s talked about.

Hope this wake-up call sinks in and y’all go and prosper with women in your league or you rise to the occasion and can cut it for these fake barbies because the sh*t is not cheap and the majority of y’all cash flow isn’t large enough or quick enough. But I digress, until next time, keep your finances and emotions in order.

-Cowherd

Cowherd’s Corner: The “90 Day” Rule

Last week I asked Twitter their thoughts on the “90 Day Rule” and I received different responses including “it’s childish” and “it’s the dumbest thing I’ve ever heard of in my life.” For those reading this that may be unfamiliar with the 90 day rule; it is when a female withholds sexual relations with a male she’s interested in for this allotted time.

The reasoning is that if a guy respects you and is genuinely interested in you, he will be okay with no sex for 90 days. This rule does nothing, but simply allows a “hoe” to feel as if she’s accomplishing something meaningful. The point is that men will respect a female that’s real about what she wants and what she’s willing to do to get it, without being overbearing or too forward. For example, I know a good friend of mine who had sex with her current boyfriend of multiple years in the first week.

If a female hits a guy with the 90 day rule, 8.5 out of 10 times he is getting his nut from another source.  Hate to break it to you, but you are only providing 80 percent of what he needs, and while he may enjoy it, best believe that 20 percent is getting fulfilled elsewhere.

Honestly, my advice is to not even tell a guy that you are implementing the rule. We as guys are too competitive, all we’ll do is try and get in your pants in less than 90 days, and the guys who cannot cut it will give up. Now, let me say that I do not think that if a guy gives up on you before the 90 days is up that he had savage intentions. I simply think that he just realized he could get some from a female in a less amount of time. However, if he sticks around that’s a solid indicator that he might actually be in it for more.

The rule should not be about if the guy can last 90 days, but more so can a female remain desirable and wanted for 90 days without spreading her legs. There aren’t too many females who can watch sports, drink a brew, do what the guy enjoys and still have quality sex appeal.

Ladies, make the 90 day rule about showing that you are actually sexier because of other things than your looks. If you are doing the 90 day rule to test him, then you have failed. You are putting your worth in someone else’s hands and that is a dangerous thing to do. The rule serves no purpose.

If you would like to respond feel free to tweet or email me. Until next week, keep your finances and emotions in order.  

-Cowherd

(Photo via Chicago Now)

Cowherd’s Corner: She Smashed the Homie

This post might be a day late, but always on time. I’m going to take it back to about 2011 when Ray J found out “Danger” smashed the homie. As everyone knows, Ray J was looking for “love” when he found out one of the contestants had been dogged out by his mans. This is something that happens all the time, whether it is in your local community, college environment, or right at this very moment. How, you may ask, does one react when he finds out the girl he wants to be exclusive with smashed the homie? Well, keep reading.

There really are several key factors that come into play, but in my opinion the main two are time and closeness to this “so called homie”. If she was smashed two to four years prior to meeting you, then she’s in the clear. Let’s be honest, she’s probably been smashed by a few other dudes you might later meet, so take that L and keep it pushing. At some point, you are going to have to be comfortable with what it is you’re putting down. Females sense that insecurity bullshit, and honestly, that’s when she’s going to be calling homie back up, so chill. 

If she had relations with a homie who could be in the wedding, that’s when it gets a little stickier. You could just dead her off that, but I can guarantee she’ll tell you, “Bae, it was nothing,”, “It only happened once”, or definitely “I love you and only you. He and I don’t even speak anymore.”  You really find yourself in a dilemma here. Do you swallow your pride for your love or do you let your love go for your pride? In my opinion, if he’s truly your mans, it’s something he won’t hold over your head, but then again, I wouldn’t cuff a chick that smashed the homie. To be quite frank, there are some dudes I could overlook and just focus on us (me and her). However, there are some I’d just be like “Fuck no”. To clear this up, these are the homies that have probably already let me know what’s up before she and I got that serious anyways. Men tend to look out for each other in these scenarios while woman tend to be catty. No shade, just facts.

Listen, if you’re really feeling her, and she holds you down, watch “The Best Man,” play some video games, and get over it. She had no obligation to keep her box on lockdown when she didn’t know you. Now that she does, trust in that, and believe in her. Until next week, keep your finances and emotions in order. 

-Cowherd

(Photo by Casual Dating Reviews)

Cowherd’s Corner: Communication

This week, we’ll take a brief dive into the ultimate relationship killer, not another female, not a mutual distaste for each other but that one thing that our generation can’t seem to understand, communication.

Every guy has had the moment in a relationship/situationship where he asks his girl, “What’s wrong/ what’s the matter?” She almost, without hesitation, responds, “Nothing”. We; however, know damn well something is wrong, but in our small minds, we’ve got a bracket to deal with, we’re trying to advance on the next mission of Titanfall, we’re listening to that new YG album to fake gangbang to, any number of things. In that moment when we asked you that question, helping you and being affectionate and caring was all that mattered; when you answered “nothing”, we trusted that there isn’t a problem and let it go.

Let’s fast forward, shall we? Two weeks later, life is good. Y’all are happy, and you think you’re doing pretty good as a boyfriend or whatever you are.  You’re chillin’, watching the game, and she says those four words that we all hate to hear, “We need to talk.” Now, you’re thinking of every text conversation you’ve had with another girl, thinking about things you’ve tweeted, and did you get rid of those nudes (put ‘em in an app that has a code). Shit, you’re even thinking about whether or not you made it Facebook official (if need be).

She proceeds to speak the words “Remember when…”. At this point, you’re really debating whether or not to catch amnesia on her ass or actually remember whatever it is she’s calling to your attention. As she continues, a part of you is relieved and elated to know it’s that thing from two weeks ago, but the other part of you is like “I do not  give a fuck at all because now is not the time.” We hear you like Charlie Brown hears his teacher and then the timing just be God awful. You ask us about something that happened two weeks ago, is worse than you asking us if an outfit makes you look fat. We are not going to give a fourth of a f*** about that shit from two weeks ago because that’s when it happened and it should have been addressed then.

Ladies, do us a favor; take advantage of our ears when we’re willing to lend them. You’re asking for us to go back in time to grab feelings that aren’t there anymore because we live in the moment, and in our current moment, you’re happy, so I am happy, and we were probably trying to get some loving later on anyway. This cockblock of a conversation makes every guy want to scream “Damn, I don’t care anymore!” However, every smart man listens closely until he finds the time to STRIKE! She gets to ”communicate” about some shit that happened two weeks ago while you, my friend ,get to lay the pipe and take her mind off of it, letting her know that as long as you’re here, she has nothing to worry about. Until next week, my friends, keep your finances and emotions in order. 

– Cowherd

(Photo by Mark Jackson)

Cowherd’s Corner: Friend Zone

Last week, we touched on commitment from a guys’ perspective. Some agreed while some disagreed, but there was an overall appreciation. I will spend some time in this post and ones to come on the infamous “friend zone”, beginning with “going Dutch”.

This week, I would like to share “when to go Dutch”. For those who may not know, “going Dutch” has nothing to do with traveling for you broke folks. It actually saves you money. It means that each party pays for their own items when on a date.

Fellas, if you don’t know how to friend zone a female, go Dutch. It doesn’t mean you’re broke; it means a financial commitment to her is not happening. However, if you do it at the wrong time with the wrong female, you’ll NEVER get the box.

That’s why we spend money, right? We don’t go on $200 dates because we want to get to know a female on a deeper level; we’d go get groceries and have her cook at the crib for that. We spend that money because we are putting a value on her box. 

Sometimes, it costs less. Sometimes, it may cost more and not necessarily monetarily, but costly in regards to time, but time is money, right?

So, you might be thinking, Cowherd, where the hell are you going with this? What I’m saying is – whether it’s time or money, you choose to invest in a female, those two items are resources that will never come back to you. Therefore, friend zone and invest accordingly, idiots.

Too many men consistently spend what they don’t have and do not get the outcome they invested in. Until next week, keep your emotions and finances in order. 

-Cowherd

(Photo by WikiHow)

Cowherd’s Corner: Commitment

My name is Cowherd, a 22 year-old single male who’s been known to be a “loose cannon”. Cowherd’s Corner is a portal to the everyday thinking of men on multiple categories. Things posted will be controversial and you may not like them, but the beautiful thing about this country is you have the freedom to enjoy the rest of the site.

So, I am going to jump right into things and talk about –  commitment. Talking to the homies on a daily basis, the overall consensus is “these hoes ain’t loyal”. We as males are brass, instinctual, and DUMB. We don’t think about our actions, we just do. Ironically, can tie into our over admiration for Nike’s motto “Just Do It”. But nonetheless of course some of us want the goods without the commitment.

However, how many women want the materialistic things without the headaches, heartaches, and everyday bs? I’m just saying, we as males get ridiculed so much for being “ain’t sh*t n*****” and these b****** acting like they stuff don’t stink. These females rather commit to a bag, shoes, jewelry; hell ALL three because they’re replaceable, don’t speak, or cheat.

Stop playing victim, because the stuff is getting old and dried up. Consider this, stop playing the role of wife to a dude that’s playing you more than his Xbox One or PS4. In the words of Fabolous “Don’t make a ho, your husband either, hard to win the game when you’re playing with a cheater”. Until next week beautiful people, keep your emotions and financing in order. 

– Cowherd

(Photo by Soft PMO)

Gift Ideas for Him and Her

Valentine’s Day is often considered “women’s appreciation day,” but the truth is that today is a holiday that celebrates love for everyone. Here’s a short list of gift ideas that incorporate gifts for women AND men. 

~Jaleesa Lashay~

5 Gift Ideas for Him and Her

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1. Red Roses from Flower Delivery Express

2. His and Her Glasses by Kate Spade

3. Box of Chocolates from Godiva

4. Jewelry by Tiffanys

5. Cuff Links by R&B Jewelry.

 

You Can Tell A Lot About A Man By……

That’s right Ladies. You can tell a lot about a man by his RECENTLY USED emoticons. The fact of the matter is if a man’s recently used emoticons includes the majority of the ones in the photo below, you my sister have a problem.

It’s the truth. Why? Well, for starters men DO NOT send each other kissy faces, winks, or faces with the tongue out. Therefore, if your man has those within his phone then he is either using them in a text to another female OR on Instagram under a photo caption, which is not okay.

Now, I know that some of the men are saying well why don’t I just check my woman’s recently used emoticons. You can’t. Period. The truth is that the majority of women have a “gay” relationship with their best friends or any other female for that matter. We send each other kiss faces and even comment on one another pics with inappropriate emoticons, but you sir have no excuse.

Men can not have those type of relationships with each other, so ladies if your man has one of those faces and it wasn’t sent to you….then you need to address it. I mean, that is a big issue, and you shouldn’t even be bothered with him.

DISCLAIMER: It’s unhealthy to invade your man’s privacy, so you shouldn’t be in his phone (I’m not suggesting that you snoop). However, if you are with him, you should bring it up and see if he let’s you view his recently used. That will tell it all.

Let me know what you think.

~Jaleesa Lashay~

(Photo by WonderHowTo)

(Photo by Steve Garfield)